dream 18jan2008

walking in a hallway dark not scary but dim and then with b, into a cafeteria-looking room and we have been looking for something but not finding it, and she is in trouble for killing a man and we're not friends but not enemies either and things are tense and awkward and i want it to be unfuckedup and friends because she needs help and i could do something and i hate feeling like this, compromised into being unable to be friends, but can't forgive without some sign of friendship, or caring, and there's just words and platitudes and i do not want to be here but am forced to (the way that you don't know why you have to do something in a dream but you just know it) so i do it and the tension is worse but i'm not angry just sad, overwhelmingly sad, and it's dim like we're where even sadness is something to see and the look on her face is best described as vexed or "i know something needs to be done but i don't know what" and i wake.

dream 17jan2008

party, loud, obnoxious, siba is there and i am flirting, things get romantic and i wind up at the Dr's who is telling me I have an STD while he holds a syringe.

when i stepped into the water, i slipped and broke my aura...

I don't know. This at home, in the heart, complex and annoying. Feeling ...not broken, but pathetic, bathetic. Sterling's preggers, Sun's home, Avery is huge, my mother thinks I hate her or I'm a jerk, I don't really know anymore. hot sub w/ sun earlier. she's way cool and outta all the girls probably the one I am most comfortable with. I love taitai and meimei and sterling, but sun's a good mix of them all. i think in jan i will go with mills to get my tattoo. she's gotta decide what she wants though...I'm getting a new tele tomorrow, I hope. I am giving the SG to Mei-mei to fuck with, the pickguard to either sun or tai-tai. new guitars are funfunfun, always leads you somewhere else, like a new girl or a new car or a new way home.

I have a dog now, he is cute and small and I am responsible for him. I hope to get a cat sooner rather than later; a jellicle for preference (gonna name her "Sally Pimienta").

talked to eden like 4 or 5 times in the last week; things are rough on his end vis-a-vis V. which sucks, he's had it rough sometimes. he was very sincere and sorry about getting out of touch with us all, said thanks for me trying to keep in touch with him since he didn't know how to start things. he's spoken to solo and bunny and will probably maybe this time come to miami. I dunno. Told me Mo's living in O-town and they don't really hang or speak. eden talks to mike now and again tho..

while moving I found some boxes with pictures. i feel distant from them, they don't really touch me anymore...I don't know how to feel about that.

good books: world war Z, that dylan bio I'm xmas'ing away, the last postsecret book mills gave me for xmas
good music: night ripper by girl talk -- all samples...shit, it's like "paul's boutique" all over again; coil's "the ape of naples" which i re-listened to because bunny hooked me up with coil bootlegs and i ran into an interview with sleazy from last year about all the shit since balance died...oh and the new fucking daft punk album is so fucking hot it glows

vignette: eden's gf at the time lived on sunset, i go with him to hang, her gay friend says hello -- i am broken and falldown ebcause of mo. i leave the party and go to his old pad with ron -- rose was there even then -- and tell him our friendship's over. he tells rose that if it's her fault...blahblahblah. i tell him it's his fault, it's about b but more about how he didn't tell me. i leave and go back to the party. the girlfriend's gay friend tells me my aura has changed color dramatically -- from orange/red to green (or other way? I don't remember the colors he said). I tell eden and tell him what happened.

thxgiving update

vacation: sucked, I worked on the house and w/ the fam (jesus they are tireless)

work: I am a hero and an unsung rockstar of unprecedented caliber. we had a server -- the one and only web server, the one that has hard drives that grriiiiiiiinnnnnddddd when they spin up and has therefore not been turned off for 5 years and then because of a power failure, and not been updated for about 10 years -- have it's PSU blow up and catch fire. despite this, I was able to get us working (hobbled, but hey) for the few days it took to get the machine repaired.


i bought a jawesome! map in a magnelephant frame at my dad's neighbors' moving out garage sale. my ex-landlord is in foreclosure and I picked up 3 GTA games for 30 bux.

this morning i dreamt that had gone to sleep late (i had) and got woken up by my cell and it was she calling to say there were things unsaid. i never got to hear them because the alarm went off.

oh my GOD

I just identified with Forrest Gump. Fuck you, Robert Zemekis, Fuck you Tom Hanks.

can i get a RAMEN?!

RAMEN!

quick notes: houses are a bitch, plumbers are expensive, a person who has just insulted your choice in homes blushes a lot, the hard rock casino is fugly in a sodom & gamorrah way*, also, I have interwebaolnet and telephone at the new home. Now I just have to actually set up a network the way I want it instead of a laptop in the kitchen.

*ok, why is it that sodomy is named after sodom but there's not a sexual act named for gamorah? was gamorah's wickedness different but sodom was just full of ass-fuckers? or they both did it but sodom was really promoting it -- public anal sex or something -- and gamorrah was just keeping it on the Down Low?

I'm a little pimp with my hair slicked back

"willie the pimp" from Zappa's "Hot Rats" album, which I first bought in DC when I lived there with my dad. I loved the feeling of walking down the streets with the cherry blossoms still gleaming white and the heat coming down hard. Awesome guitar solo and Captain Beefheart singing. HOT BEEF! HOT RATS! WOO-WOO-WOOT!

dream 290ct2007

sex, space travel, running across a cliff next to a forest, then singing "holiday in cambodia". i wake singing dead kennedys.

xkcd

xkcd - A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language - By Randall Munroe: "http://xkcd.com/334/"

call me morbid, call me pale.

what makes me saddest about the whole thing is how pointless it was. i mean, so many ways to end it that wouldn't have caused all that kind of fallout. "oh well" is all there is to say and it doesn't seem enough.

this real estate bullshit is fucking bullshit. every time i get closer to the house it's a change of what was expected. jesus. it's like dating but with the payoff that you're in debt well beyond your eyeballs. a bugfuck crazy girlfriend is tame compared to this kind of frustration.

that bad bad man, stagolee

maybe remaking stagger lee to be about delia day? the grateful dead's version names delia as billy's woman....hmmmm....

capo II:
Em11 -> E shuffle, B7, G

Em11 000000


switch to

E - E7 / E7b5 - Bb13
xx2100 - xx2103 / xx0100 - xx0103

new song, "oh"

G / / / Cm / / / G / / / Cm / / /
oh don't you go oh won't you oh

Dsus4 D Dsus2 G / / / Cm9/x33543
look at me when you say goodbye

I'm gonna be an uncle again!

Just the one time: w00t.

chicken tikka masala with aromatic rice

Inspired by Jimbo's recent recipe, here's my recipe for chicken tikka masala.

you will need:
1lb chicken (2 large or 3 small breasts should be around right)
1Tablespoon olive oil
3 cloves garlic
1 small onion or 1/2 large onion
1 spoonful of garam marsala
1/4 cup curry powder
1/8 cup chili powder
1 large can of crushed tomatoes
1/2 stick butter
1/2 cup heavy cream
3/4 cup cottage cheese
1 cup basmati rice
4 or 5 sprigs of mint (or raisins and almond slivers)

heat the olive oil, crush and slice the garlic and sautee it. Once half-done at very low heat, throw in the sliced and chopped onion, throw in a pinch of salt and the butter. While it melts, cube the chicken breasts and toss them in the garam marsala and then into the pan. Cook all thoroughly.

When the chicken's done, toss in the curry and chili powders and stir until they're incorporated. Pour in the tomatoes and let the mix heat up again, then include the cream and cottage cheese. Leave simmering at medium-low heat while you prepare the rice, which is stupid easy:
rice and water in a covered bowl in the microwave at full power for 5 mins, then half-power for 10 minutes. Let it sit 5 mins while you chop up the mint, which you will incorporate into the rice while fluffing with fork. (substitute golden raisins and almond slivers if you don't like minty rice).

Serve the tikka masala on the rice. Consider buying some naan bread. Serves at least 4.