04 July 2013


I'm under no illusion as to what I meant to you but you made an impression sometimes I still feel the bruise.

12 February 2009


This blog is moving to http://yukbon.com
Stalkers, update your bookmarks.

07 February 2009

i have no title and i must post

So. Phlebotomy came back: drink more water. Otherwise I am healthy as a horse.

Been listening to lots of Jeff Buckley lately and playing some on guitar or at least I was until....

The daddy thing. It's still something I'm having a hard time believing. I mean it's like the polar opposite of when a bad sudden thing happens -- like when there's a car crash or someone dies or your true love breaks your heart and you cannot believe it -- I'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around it. Today the Mrs needed a bit of a break so I took her side of the bed next to the crib and let her rest and I still look over and play with his nose and the forehead while he sleeps and coos and twitters and it's slowly sinking in that I am the cause of and responsible for a tiny little life. It is awesome and brutal.

22 January 2009


This birthing business is so horrifying, there are not words.

Sent from my mobile device


21 January 2009

only now do i remember it clear

First things first: the new Decemberists' single is fucking awesome. Go click that, they will give you the mp3 for free. Which is good, because rakes are broke.

Second things second: this pregnancy thing is harrowing. I've gone from stone sleep to dressed and going WHAT in 2 seconds flat. So far no baby yet.

3rd things next: so I'm at the hospital at like fucking ungodly-a.m. or whatever, and the world turns so daylight happens and here comes the inaugural and holy fuck we have a black president. and fucking hell, he's smart, and capable, and maybe, just maybe, the whole country isn't going into ruin right this fucking second. Cleolinda Jones said something about holding your breath and being horrified that the last 8 years have been something that the people of the country actually wanted and how horrifyingly terrible the idea of that has been, and honestly I've still been holding my breath, worried that it might not happen, that something would fuck up before President-elect Obama became President Obama. My standards are not high: anyone who won't be a craven whore, intent on just using the flag to whip his flaccid dick all over the constitution and the ideals of what this country should be would be a great improvement.

12 January 2009

recent song titles

the fish that got away
thrush to go
god knows, xxxxx
the bad man's prayer

i'm still writing 'the fish that got away'.

30 December 2008

20 miles out of town and cold irons bound

fixed up the house w/ my brother -- sealed off afucked up wall and made a closet work again; gotta wait on the painting. put up a house # sign, did a few bits and pieces on the inside of the house. now that i've gotten into the rhythm of it, I think I'll keep going. it is fun. he particularly loved the starfruit tree, they don't have it in AL so it's a particular treat. he leaves tomorrow -- i never did get to cook some indian for him, but i packed him off with a buncha CDs and some spice packets for making indian at home as well as some books I had laying around that I wasn't ever gonna crack open again. we hit up the holocaust memorial and took pictures of the statues.

i wrote a new song, "thrush to go". needs music, maybe later.

it really struck me, truly and well. i can barely stand to think about it. pobrecita ella y pobrecito yo. obladi.

15 December 2008

13 December 2008

dream 13dec08

there's a house, concrete and a bit of grass i am outside between the house and the fence of the next house and there's a bike chase and a car chase through what feels like the old church on westward or maybe the police station in VG and then there's a diff house or diff aspect of same house feels dark dry kind of shack-like with rickety stairs etc and i leave and things happen i don't remember now but walking down sidewalk on westward and suddenly b is there or mentioned and suddenly part pf the group we're in? and she's married or marrying this guy whose name is john buttersbtu (even in the dream i'm like "wtf is up with that name is it an anagram?" and i am fucking racking my brain going "what's wrong with that name dammit") and at some point with very minimal speaking i communicate w/ her that she's not actually on my shit list anymore and we're not buddy-buddy but at least the mood lightens in the dream and we all walk into a restaurant (or it could be Scoops the icecream joint) -- doesn't matter, we don't order or eat or anything, all these places are just scenery mostly -- and she tells me she's been sick and i say yes i heard about the heart she says no no like throwing up and upset stomach sick all day and i say well shit maybe you have morning pregnancy i mean morning sickness (even in the dream i am a clutz and prone to spoonerisms) and cut to i am back at the shack but outside and leading to a different adjoining house whose interior feels japanese in it's sparseness, but american in deisgn if that makes sense and there's like an art show but filled to the brim with weapons and this feels coincidental until midgets (they look like children, but they are so not children) start a takeover coup thing and we're just fucking running and it's me, vij and two other dudes and we're on foot and then acquire an suv and they drop me in my neighborhood and i'm walking the three blocks to my place when i notice i am by b's house (i am standing by mailbox, letters say 'john buttersbtu' and 'elizabeth buttersbtu') and i am kinda weirded out that they live like 2 blocks from me and i think of our kids playing together AND THEN CUT straight back to the shop and she steps out and comes back w/ an ept and shaking her head 'no' and i say 'well it usually takes like 6 weeks to even be able to tell on one of those, but they are like 99.999 accurate' and she is both sad and relieved and i am a blank slate nothing showing and cut back to chase scene and i am sneaking into the shack so the evil pigmy midget kids don't know i'm on to them or clue in to me being armed to the teeth and intent on fucking up their day and i am halfway up the shack house stairs (the whole house is basically room and then stairs-to-next-room, structurally unsound but securitywise easy to defend) and their plot can be unravelled by basically going to the last room and knocking out this transmitter thing and i am halfway through when they catch on and i'm in a room with just a couple of old people and i know the rest of the way is clear i just want to keep the position from being taken and i am by the door keeping them out and the old woman is offering me sweets from a bag and all i have to do is keep the door closed and those dudes are fucked no way in and i wake up

seriously if you know what this dream is about, help a brother out. perhaps influence of the full moon.

06 December 2008

Wherein it is confirmed that I am a horrible person

CLME over at ye olde penismightier independently confirms that I am a bad person. 

So the thing is, I love Warren Ellis' work. At least that which I have read, which is honestly mostly "Transmetropolitan". But when you run across a masterwork, you know it. And so he has a journal. And in that journal, Warren did a very bad thing.

Seriously, that 1man1jar.com thing is the most horrible thing ever. 

04 December 2008

MTV Movies Blog » J. Michael Straczynski On ‘World War Z’: ‘The Scale Of What We’re Doing Here Is Phenomenal’

MTV Movies Blog » J. Michael Straczynski On ‘World War Z’: ‘The Scale Of What We’re Doing Here Is Phenomenal’

World War Z was actually pretty good in an amateurish way -- the military sections, particularly the American military personel interviews, all came off as fanboy-ish and fawningly cheesy -- and I really hope they don't fuck it up.

20 November 2008

vegan vegetable korma

This is the vegan version; the non-vegan version replaces the coconut milk with heavy cream.

You will need:
4 potatoes, diced
4 carrots, diced
6 onions, really fucking diced
4-6 garlic cloves, minced
1 lb bag of frozen peas
1 lb bag of frozen cauliflower
1 red pepper, diced
1 green pepper, diced
3 jalapenos, diced (optional: seeded)
1 tblsp salt
1/4 cup curry powder
1 tblspoon garam marsala
1/4 cup vegetable oil (avoid olive oil if you can help it)
ginger, minced into paste about 1 tblsp.
tomato sauce, 15-oz can
coconut milk, 15-oz can

Put the oil into pan, add medium heat; put onions into oil until tender (soft but not translucent) then add garlic and ginger. add salt, stir and wait 3 minutes for them to blend a bit. Dump in all the other veggies, tomato sauce, curry powder and garam marsala, stir. If it feels like there's too little liquid in there, relax -- the onion will sweat quite a bit out and the tomato sauce will help things get going. When you put in the coconut milk (at the end) you'll get more liquid as well. Put your cauliflower and peas in the microwave and cook 'em up. when they're done, incorporate into the mixture and add coconut milk by 1/4 can until you get an orange-y yellow color. When the potato and carrots are fork-tender, you're done. serve over rice and/or w/ naan. The coconut milk makes it a bit sweeter than you would perhaps expect, so take that into account when deciding how spicy you want it.

I cooked this for 24 (modified to: 10 potator, 6 carrots, 10 onions, 2 cans tomato, 1 whole can coconut, 24 cloves garlic, 1/2 c curry & oil and double the peppers) for a charity luncheon at work; looks like we cleared enough to get 3 or 4 kids' cleft palates fixed for Christmas. Also, I burned my hand.

19 November 2008

we've been made, boys, scatter and meet at the regroup point

My favorite submissive violining kinkette sends this to me via IM: Rands In Repose: The Nerd Handbook. The cave thing is a bit heavy on the otaku-OCD nerd angle, but otherwise, totally fucking spot on in every way possible. Whoa.