a quote, so i don't forget it.

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly." Sam Keen

There is this thing that's like talking except you don't talk

It's funny, but I came to the conclusion somewhere along my early 20's that half of life is just fucking going for it, faking your way through it. There's this passage in David Foster Wallace's "Infinite Jest" where he rattles of a list of things that you learn in AA -- homilies and things that are basically amusing one-liners etc -- and the one that stuck with me the most and the longest was "fake it until you make it", ie, giving lip service to something (like that you will not drink,) until you actually get there. Half of doing something scary is faking your way into making others think you can do it and then actually following up on it. I was never a great musician, poet, writer or lover (on the last I have no actual proof, but statistically it's unlikely, although I haven't gotten any complaints,) but got by largely on bravado and some glimmers of talent and promise. An inventive turn of phrase, a neat line or idea, some of my ludicrous overabundance of romance and sincerity. I'm a big fan of daring yourself to do something and then doing it and finding out that it turned out quite alright.

Or better than alright, but really good. Really fucking good.

So few people sing aloud -- in cars or bars being the big exceptions I bet -- I never see people singing to themselves or to others for no reason other than that it feels good to sing. For the longest time, the Legendary Pink Dots' motto has been "sing while you may". A sort of shorthand for the "eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die", I guess. It's a damned shame that so few people do sing, though. I love hearing amateurs sing, especially when they're not half-bad. Something about just going for it just makes people smile and laugh and glow inside in a way they normally don't.

So you get a few songs about singing:

Morrissey's "Sing Your Life"

Morrissey gets a bad rap for being a sad sack all the time. It just isn't true. His Smiths work had a bit more (melo-)dramatic I-am-young-and-misunderstood tinge to it, true enough, but there was also a lot of really mordant humor to it. His solo stuff has been on the whole much more varied and lively. It's just as likely to be something really weird and wickedly funny as it is to be something depressing. "Sing Your Life" really covers the whole "sing while you
can, and fuck 'em if they can't take a joke" ethos:

"make no mistake my friends,
all of this will end.
so sing your life:
the things you love and the things you loathe"

as well as a really sweet affirmation of how you're alright after all, man:

"you have a lovely singing voice"

I love love love the Legendary Pink Dots. They're not everyone's cup of tea (although I really really really mean it when I say: it's your loss, man), but that's not my point. My point in bringing them up is that I've been on their mailing list for ages -- cloud-zero, in case you care -- and so has Amanda Palmer of The Dresden Dolls. In fact, that's how I found out about The Dresden Dolls. They're kind of a punk cabaret thing (their label,) although if I have to describe them to friends it usually winds up being something like: If Tori Amos had a drummer, was way more neurotic and less obtuse, and really liked Cabaret music , it'd probably sound like that. So anyway, they sing about sex changes and sex toys and are really fun, and their new album, "Yes, Virginia" is coming out pretty damn soon, although it's already leaked on the 'net. It has a bunch of great songs (of note: "sex changes", "my alcoholic friends", "mandy goes to med school" and the one that I am going to hook you up with, "sing") and you should check it out. "Sing" is kind of a call to arms to not be afraid and to just uh...sing. So while it's not like Amanda and I are friends -- I very much doubt if she'd ever be able to remember a post of mine on the list, seeing as I post really rarely, and also she's apparently been beyond busy with her band and touring etc -- I was aware of the Dresden Dolls since before their first album came out (mostly because Jon Whitney of brainwashed.com going on about them, not that Amanda was pushing her stuff on folks).

life is no cabaret
we don't care what you say
we're invading you anyway
you motherfuckers you sing something

"Sing" by The Dresden Dolls, from their new album, Yes, Virginia.

The whole album is beyond great and you're missing out if you haven't already fallen madly in love with the band (which is really just Amanda and her drummer, Brian ("he is a nice man, fairly reliable, he's in a rock band" as the song "Mandy goes to med school" describes him).

They also have a lovely little blog of their own (although it appears that it's mostly Amanda writing -- at least I've not read a post by Brian yet) which is full of very amusing and surprisingly honest writing. My favorite little snippet at the moment is this bit here:

we went into the studio on an off-day and there was a local community group called Girl Authority laying down vocals for a record of cover songs ranging from pink to madonna to joan jett. picture nine 8-13 year-old girls in a recording studio for the first time, running around like maniacs. they had given themselves Girl Names a la the spice girls....there was Fashion Girl, Rock n roll Girl and Bohemian Girl (my personal favorite) to name but three. i was in complete heaven watching this spectacle. they didn't know about the band (except rock n' roll girl, who was familiar with, surprise, coin-operated boy), but they were fascinated by me and brian ("are you Real Rock Stars? are you Rich? do you Travel the World?") and i saw myself through my own eyes at age 12. it was beautiful and heartbreaking. i wish i knew now whatever i knew back then. according to paul and sean, after we left the studio there was a mild uproar of dresden-dolls mania as they all fought for use of the computer to get on our site and download the videos. apparently, they downloaded the Halloween Strip-tease Skit and they all decided that they Loved Brian (and i assume, Wanted To Marry Him). Sometimes I think I'd like to skip the rock circuit altogether and just visit grade schools.

Also, she's totally spot-on about the Jesus Christ Supercop thing: it's hysterical.

...and one last thing: http://www.dresdendolls.com/video/index.htm has excellent video stuff...